Monday, April 7, 2008

Day 36: Awesome Possum Kicks Dr. Machino's Butt!

Awesome Possum could have been very popular with kids who'd never played Sonic the Hedgehog before and didn't mind having social issues crammed down their throats with digitized cries of "That's awesome!" Awesome is an anthropomorphic hedgehog opossum with "attitude" who has to defeat the evil Dr. Robotnik Machino to save the world. I'm surprised the makers of this game went with Awesome instead of breaking out the old Roget's thesaurus and finding a synonym for Sonic.

Awesome Possum might have been just a slower version of Sonic the Hedgehog, but it wanted to do something more. It wanted kids to care about the environment. And if collecting discarded recyclables and fighting robot loggers in the rain forest doesn't get the point across, maybe this will:

How many gallons of oil would have been saved by not manufacturing and shipping this game? Honestly, bible games are less preachy than Awesome Possum.

As a game, it fairs even worse than it does as a brainwashing tool. The controls are sloppy and unresponsive, making the game more difficult than something with AI this terrible really should be. Robots sometimes just walk off ledges to their deaths. Others simply go about their duties of deforestation, completely oblivious to Awesome's presence.

There's absolutely nothing awesome about Awesome Possum. That's right. I said it. Hey, the makers of the game didn't go out of their way to be creative, so why should I?

No comments: